Cold Snap

It's cold here this weekend. And when I say it's cold, I mean that it's cold enough that the warnings suggest not that we bundle up before going out, but that we don't go out at all. It's a sort of cold that feels aggressive and invasive. It's distracting and exhausting. I'm wearing long underwear in the house and have closed off the bedroom to make better use of the heat my sad little furnace is capable of generating. Because the bedroom is icy cold, (note the photo of my windows from the inside) I've pulled out the bed in my sofa and have it piled high with blankets, pillows, my books and my computer. The TV remote is close by. I may never need to leave.

I spend a lot of time at home, but I spend most of my time at home feeling like I should be doing something else or going somewhere else or talking to someone else. It's grad student guilt. There's so much time and so much work and I'm about a quart low on discipline. So when the temperature isn't predicted to reach zero degrees and the television newscasters are talking about the cold in serious tones, I feel completely justified in crawling into my nest and hunkering down. I made chicken and noodles yesterday and muffins this morning. I keep sticking my cold toes under Bug's warm belly and taking breaks from this week's work to read blogs and watch television. I don't have to go anywhere else. I'm really not allowed to because that meteorologist I don't usually take seriously said so. Or at least that's what I'm telling myself. Grad students get so few opportunities to settle in without guilt, and I'm going to enjoy every minute of this.

I am starting to wonder, though, if I'll ever be warm again.